Overdrawn for time...
10:33 a.m.

Well, here it is. I�m done. Lying there next to you in the early morning hours, watching you sleep, I was restless. My thoughts raced even though I was so tired. Limbs casually and tenderly entwined. At one point you held my hand as you slept. If you could hear the thoughts that taunt me because I haven�t the courage to say them out loud� �You make me so happy. I�m scared being this happy. Of waking up from this dream. Please come back from Bermuda safely� I love the way you feel. All of you. I love your scent on my skin and the way you touch me. I like being able to smell my perfume on your skin in the gray light of dawn. I love the weight of you, the sound of your voice as you murmur quiet private things to me, the catch of your breath, the strong column of your throat. Your arms and broad shoulders are a joy to hold onto, to kiss, to taste. Your stomach and the way those muscles tense when I touch you, running my hands down your flanks. The way you look at me in one of those moments of quiet. Your steady calm blue eyes I could quietly joyfully drown in.�

�It�s all so new, you see. It scares me to think this way. Already I have memories with you to grow old on. I�d like more, if you want to keep me around for a while longer. Talk to me. Say anything at all. Your voice is like a caress. I�m fascinated by the way you think. Your humor and your knowledge. How is it that you can say things that I have always thought myself alone in thinking? The passion you have for sailing is so close to my own. The smile on your face that night when we sailed under a full moon, was exactly how I felt. You leave me surprised and stunned by happiness. I�ve only ever been this happy sailing. And now it�s even better, sailing with you. Where have you been? I love your smile. The way you hold me does crazy things to my heartbeat. Did you know you make me weak in the knees? It�s ridiculous. But then you pick me up and I�m helpless with laughter and desire. Let me hold you a little closer. Even if it�s just for these few hours. I can rest here in your arms, listening to your quiet breathing. I�m only a breath away from you. I wish I could stop time�just for this moment, right here. Please be safe. I�ll be thinking of you.��

That is what I would say to you if I had the courage to speak. I�m the original gutless wonder when it comes to this sort of thing. (grin) And I�m always better at writing things down than I am at speaking. Good luck. I�ll see you when you get home. I�ll miss you. -J

When the sum of my life is done and the figures tallied in final, the time spent on this task or that chore, the tears shed for one reason or the other seem not so important now. The laughter shared with this person or that one, the love felt here and there for those who have touched my soul far less, would count for so very little. In the final accounting of my life, I�ll be found overdrawn... for time with you.

<< - >>

how this works
add your entry
current letter
older letters
guestbook
notify list
profile
email
host
lex