Halloween #1
2:06 p.m.

Dear L:

I'm really sorry I was being devious with the boy I'm pretty sure you are still in love with. I got some misinformation. I thought you were making out with the boy I was once upon a time in love with when I was very explicit that it must never happen with the two of you.

I swear I didn't mean to makeout with him. The plan was to just make you think that's what was going on. That was never my intention. And even though I've never considered you a very close friend, I still feel a bit guilty about it.

I feel guilty that while we were screwing around I was still bitching about you. I think it helped me to rationalize it.

And it doesn't help that he still has a girlfriend.

I won't ever send this letter. I won't ever tell you these things because I will not admit I am as whorish as you are. I will not admit that I was wrong. I will not admit that what I did was morally wrong. Because then I would have to admit that I am not as "good" as I try to be.

We are who we are when we least expect it.

And now I have to deal with this person I didn't know I was.

~Protoplast

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