letter to Duke
22:57

To the Duke Admissions Office:

I am unhappy to inform you that your website's Apply Online feature is, without question, one of the most poorly-coded sorry excuses for a field of javascript I have ever encountered. I tried, I really did, but the phenomenally poor execution of your webpage prevented me from applying.

The majority of your links are dead. The majority of your graphics do not load. The majority of your upload times last ad infinitum, forcing the individual attempting application to abort and retype all of the information over again.(and over and over and over...) There were times when I was literally shocked to see previously unthought-of glitches occur. Your drop boxes were odious offenders. Sometimes they dropped down to reveal no selectable options, while other times they simply didn't drop down at all. Occasionally, entire fields of text input would disappear before my very eyes when I clicked on them.

After many hours of dogged toil for naught, I was left with two strong impressions:
1. Your page was coded by a second rate student in a rush, who uploaded his or her JS and never checked to see if any of it worked.
2. Applying to your establishment online is tantamount to teaching a retarded salamander to fetch a stick.

Any business that put this little effort into courting its potential customers would be obliterated by bankruptcy promptly--unless, of course, that business had a name to hide behind.

Your formerly prospective student,

me

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