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Goodbye for now my intoxicating poison 10:52 p.m. Dear Colin, You are a drug. I feel high and on top of the world when I am with you. When we are apart I am neurotically depressed and longing for more of you. This is an old habit for me. I am attracted to you because you loathe me one minute and my self-esteem drops to near dangerous levels, but when you smile at me and make me scream for more I am Queen of the World. You are my prozac and my lonlilest days. I'm going into rehab. Staying as far away from your haunts and your friends--as far away as from you as possible. If you really want me, you will come and find me. If not--I no longer exist in your perception of existence and you no longer exist in mine. You will become a faint memory of someone I once upon a time let do unspeakable things to me. And sometimes when I think of you I will glow from the inside and other thoughts will make me tremble with horror and disgust. Goodbye for now my intoxicating poison. Maybe we will meet again some day. |
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