where do i look for support?
8:23 p.m.

Dear "best friends",

How about a little fucking support here? I'll admit : in the past I have not always made the greatest relationship related decisions. But guess what guys - neither have you! Let's not pretend that you're all super good at this and I'm some idiot who keeps messing up. We've grown up together, so I know. We've faced exams, hangovers and heartbreak together - we're all just struggling through, trying to work out where we're going, trying to make it all make sense. Trying together.

So now I'm with another boy, and maybe it's all a huge mistake. Maybe by Christmas we won't be able to stand the sight of each other. Maybe I'm deluding myself by thinking that this is something special.

You have seen me break hearts and get my heart broken, and you know that I am strong and I can get through those things. You have seen the bad luck (and bad guys) that I've had. Surely it's time I had something good? Surely you can see that's what he is? What kills me is that I know you can see it. I know that if you thought he was a loser, a potential heartbreaker, you'd have warned me off by now. And so the only conclusion I can draw is that this pessimism comes from the fact that you don't think I'm good enough for him.

I've known you a long time guys, and we've been through a lot, but you can't imagine how incredibly much that hurts.

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