I love you still and always
11:28 p.m.

Father of my child,

You hung up on me 42 times today. I know you have no idea that it was that many times. But the number 42 is so significant to us/you. It makes me wonder what that means.

I wonder so much. I understand you so well. I know more than you realize, yet I am still very confussed.

Together we created a beautiful baby girl. But now she is growing up with only me.

I want nothing for myself, but I want everything for her. She deserves her father and I deserve an explanation.

You saw us, I know you did. How can you stand to be so close to your daughter and not see her? I see her 24 hours a day, but if ever there was a time that I couldn't see her, couldn't be near her and I came as close to her as you did to us today there would be nothing that could keep me away from her.

I know about her. I've known a long time. I supposed you are letting me take the blame. I don't care. I love you! I will always love you. I want to understand. I know this is not serious. She is 18. You have nothing in common. You are confussed and pulled in too many directions. I was never pulling. I never wanted more than you had to give. I just want an explanation. You are trying to be angry with me, yet I have done nothing but love you. You are trying to push me away, yet I will not budge. You are trying to make me angry, but you you are only making me worry.

Please stop and talk to me. Let me understand. Let us form some sort of relationship for our baby girl. Treat me as you wish, but do not ignore your daughter.

All my love! I love you still and always!

Rachel

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