Wish You Were Here - a rebuttle
8:17 p.m.

Dear Kaytana,

We haven't talked in a while. You've been OK - you haven't mentioned Rob in a while. Now Randall's come into the picture. I admit, it seems like he's shy, but likes you. You shouldn't make those assumptions about him not ever having a girlfriend. He's 21, not 16.

You're making an assumption that he doesn't want to be a bachelor for life. Don't cry now. Sit up straight. Yesterday was the third time meeting him - why are you getting depressed? You're not depressed over ... well... you know who I mean. You can't help he has a relationship now - and you missed your chance of being with him.

You'd be better soulmates than true loves anyway.

So, what are you doing about Randall? Are you gonna scare him away? Like with Rob? Pounce him? Calm down - you can't cry again. You're getting too worked up and too little work done for English. You should study for the final too. What are you gonna do?

You're taking this too seriously again. Remember living in a cabin when you graduate - with liquor, pencils, paper and all the time in the world? Be your own cliche and be idolized by young angsty people all over the world who thought you glamorous - when you reality you killed yourself over the stupid, pathetic idea that your episodes are too much to handle. "Episodes", hah! You have major depression - not bipolar, not manic, not unipolar. You've had it for 5 1/2 years and you think you can't handle it? You've had your soul broken, been laughed at by the ones you love and felt yourself abandoned by everyone - even God.

Don't take yourself so seriously. I know you've been daydreaming about having Randall with you. Touching his face...looking into his blue ovals - but quit it for now. For now, keep your expectations low because he may just think of you as a potential FRIEND. Nothing else.

Maybe you feel the same way.

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