revolutions start small
10:38 p.m.

So listen, diary. I've decided that I am going to conquer the world. How, you say? By not giving into the pressures beyond what I want to do. I will not wear tube tobs and short-shorts and wear gobs of make-up and do my hair everyday. Likewise, I will not forbid myself from wearing lovely girly summertime knee-length skirts and sleveless shirts. I will wear overalls - even if they're nerdy-ish or out of fashion or too big for me, or whatever. I will not give up chocolate or egg rolls or french fries, no matter how bad those things are for me. Likewise, I will not feel weird about eating salad or raw cooked vegetables or pure-fruit smoothies, because I love those too. I will not bake my skin just because it "looks" healthy. Also, I will not be terribly paranoid about driving to school and forgetting to put suntan lotion on.

I will listen to my weird international music, I will listen to pop music, I will listen to classical, opera, punk rock, metal, country, R&B, rap, or talk radio - whatever suits my ear. I will like what I like, simple as that. I am not be a genre. Classic rock and oldies too. I don't have to pretend to follow any one group closely or force myself to have even a favorite group - my ear varies just as my tastebuds do.

I will not be ashamed at my body. I love my ass, I love my belly, I love my cheekbones and back and ankles and back and face and hands and arms and girly bits. I love them all. They are mine.

I will not try to impress anyone. I will not feel bad about not wanting to get to know someone better, because it makes me uncomfortable. I will not keep silent when asked if something bothers me.

I will be nice, too. I will not let myself be angered, because I want to walk away knowing I did the good thing - even if what the other person did pisses me off beyond all hell. I will not overdo it, however, I shall not be taken advantage of. I will simply, do within my bounds and range that makes me comfortable then and at the end of the day.

I will start a fucking revolution, though. I want people to look at me and think - I wish I could have that mentality. I don't want anyone to want to act like me, like the same things as me, or follow whatever thingamado I may or may not do. I just want people to see my mentality and outlook and life, and think good of that.

I will take life a day at a time. I will be me. I will not be ashamed of doing silly or awkward things or saying the wrong thing at the wrong time, because at the end of the day it's so very small.

I will enjoy my life, but know at the same time that everything can be gone in a second. I have a lot of appreciation, I really do. I will not forget what life is.

I will wear skirts. I will wear wrinkled jeans. I will wear bracelets, I will wear a watch-tan. I will laugh out loud, I will crinkle my eyebrow at something strange. I will dance in my bedroom and sing in the car, dammit, because I fucking can - and because things that make a person smile should not be something to be ashamed of.

I will sweat bullets at the gym and not give a shit. Jesus, it's exercising - what do you expect? I will feel proud in my skin, but I will never be pretentious.

Life's easy. It's not difficult. It is all about your perception and just accepting what makes you, *you*. Because even the things I think we sometimes feel ashamed about, we often like - we're just afraid to let people see that we like those possibly imperfect things about ourselves.

I will conquer the world.

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